Between The Devil and The Deep Blue Sea

Dear 1one4 Aunty,

 A couple of months ago, I got an opportunity of a lifetime - a chance to immigrate to the United States. I work with a marketing communications company while my wife works as a secretary for an Insurance company. My wife doesn’t see any need to go live in America since she believes we are comfortable here. She says we shouldn’t live certainty for uncertainty.

I have always wanted to live the American dream, go with nothing, work hard and ‘make it’. She believes in staying in Nigeria where as she says “there are no glass ceilings”. All she wants is to become the GM of her company or any other good company and is not ready to go to America to start climbing any ladder from the bottom again. America to her means holiday or vacation and nothing more. She also mentioned problems with domestic help and so on. We have five (5) domestic help here which is impossible in foreign countries as she says.

I think she is being complacent, likes the status quo as long as she is reasonably comfortable. She is not thinking of the future and that of the children. I have tried to convince her for three months now, even called her parents to intercede, nothing works. This issue is threatening to tear our family apart; we have four children together – two boys and two girls. I am thinking I should take the boys and leave her with the girls since she’s adamant. I need sincere advice here.


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