Dazed and Confused

Dear 1one4 Aunty,

I was having a light hearted conversation with my 15 year old son recently and asking about one of his friends – a girl we all call his girlfriend. He said they were no longer friends and does not want any more friends for now. I made further inquiries about what was happening with him, he said the girl was getting too close and wanted sex! I nearly died.

My son is a studious and serious boy right from his beginning. All he ever wanted was to study Politics, Philosophy and Economics in Oxford University, become Nigeria’s President and win the Nobel Prize. He is a scholar and has won several prizes both for academics and sports. To me, my son was a well-rounded and innocent boy that knew nothing about sex and if he knew, had never experienced it. When I kept digging into him, he told me he had his first sexual encounter when he was 11 with our neighbor’s daughter! These were Ghanians that lived adjacent to us and were in their 20s when they lived in the neighborhood. These girls were very friendly with us and I left my son with the girls every now and again. I never knew they were abusing my dear son.

The family have relocated back to Ghana but I feel like getting on the next flight to Accra to have them all arrested. How I and my husband managed not to notice all that was going on as parents, beats me to no end. I am traumatized and beyond sad that my son’s innocence was taken away at such a tender age. He is still his normal high achieving and ambitious self but i'm wondering what psychological problems lurks somewhere in his future. Someone please advise me; should I go after these girls? Should I leave things as they are and pray they turn out for the best? What do I do?

UmmHabib

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