Dear 1one4 Aunty,

I turned forty a couple of days ago and while i am observant Muslim and spent most of the day thanking Allah (s.w.t) for all He has done for me thus far. I am married with four healthy children. Since I turned forty, I’ve spent the last few days trying to put a lot of things in my life into perspective.

I got married at 26, few years after leaving school. I actually quit my career in advertising and PR to move closer to my husband. Since then, it has been babies, school run and being a dutiful wife. Fast forward 14 years, something in me feels really unfulfilled; like I could have been much more than being just a house wife, that I am meant for much more than where I am presently. The problem is that I do not know where to even start again. Should I go back to school and get that UK masters I’ve always wanted? Should I start applying for jobs all over again after 14 years? Should I start my own PR firm with the little experience I got before quitting?

I am really at a loss as per how to regain my life, my essence and get some fulfillment as a person beyond just being a wife and a mum. My eldest child is 12 whilst the youngest is 6. They still need a lot of nurturing, but if I wait till they are old enough, I will be 50 or thereabout and would have limited Allah greatly. How do I mitigate all these and make something of my life. Someone help me, am losing my mind here.

Jamila Thanni,

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