Letter to My Future Wife: You will In Shaa Allah Be The Happiest Woman in This World and the Next

Alhamdulilah, I was able to get your open letter in swift time during the last few days of the Holy month of Ramadan as Allah wanted it. I must say I was moved and this has made me decide to come out of my shell to pen this few words down to you as a reply to your pinpointed letter. I just hope the few words I would be telling you will find a good place in your heart and would also awake the pings in your heart so I can find you no matter where you are. My future Spouse, It is indeed related in the records of hadith that the Messenger of Allah (saws) declared that “when a man marries, he has fulfilled half of his ‘deen’.” This hadith is narrated by HadratAnasibn Malik (r.a.) who served the Prophet (saws) as his servant in his (saw’s) house for ten years and is related by At-Tirmidhi. So why wouldn’t I want to have my faith completed with such a pious and wonderful woman... you? You made me remember these wonderful hadiths which turn out to be among your favorites; “A woman is married for four reasons: for her wealth, for her background, for her beauty and for her (adherence to) religion. So marry one for her religion and you will win” [Bukhari& Muslim] also, “Four are causes of happiness: A good wife, a big house, a good neighbour and a good way of transportation” [Al-Hakim]. I would gladly want to have you come into my life to fill that missing link in and help me complete half of my deen. By Allah’s will I will be your father, brother, son, confidant, helper, companion, partner, teacher, student and most especially your best friend. I will be a husband and a father who would wake you at dawn for fajr prayers, listen to the melodious voice of yours while reciting the Qur’an to our children. I will never impose on you but make you see why we need to reach common grounds. Whenever we have differences, the option will never be my way or the highway. You will always look into my eyes and see security, peace and joy. You’ve already asked about my likes and dislike, the truth is you won’t be able to manage all of these. I am however willing to use the teachings of the Noble Qur'an and the sunnah of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) so that we understand and appreciate and tolerate one each others preferences. My best moments is however yet to come because I still haven’t met you. I will be open to you because you would be my other body. You will be the best mother any child would ask for to our children, and I will strive to arm you with all you need to achieve these. I want you to be that very person I want to talk to each time something fantastic crosses my mind and each time something not too fantastic crosses my mind too. You will be my sounding board; we will bat several ideas off each other, from the ridiculous to the absurd and the brilliant ones of course. I can assure you that if you would be a submissive wife, you will be my weakest point. This must be guarded jealously, so that people won’t use that against me. I would appreciate the fact that you talk less about me when you are with your girlfriends because only you know your intentions. I am not one of the men that expect you to remain the same, you are not a mannequin. We will grow up, we will evolve, we will all change, but it is my prayer that we grow and evolve in each others light, grow together, in sync and as one. We will complement each other perfectly be each others best critic and loudest cheerleader. Whatever personality or character changes that occur during our marriage, InshaAllah, we will manage and thrive on it. I love watching football, in fact I am a big Arsenal fan, so always make sure I get up during any match to observe my salat, but please you need to be cautious doing this. As a hopeful romantic, watch your back Madam, I will catch you unawares all the time. I promise you I would never personalize the remote to the TV and always be back home before Ishai and also take dinner with you, my future wife! My wife, my world! I am not a fan of couples having separate bedrooms, so if you don’t fancy that too, it’s all good. My dream is to have a home and not a house, a loving, peaceful home, when I walk into a room that you are and you automatically light up. I want a house built on love, humour and maybe some pranks. That is the type of relationship I want between us now and forever. I might not be able to give you a wedding like that of your friends but InshaAllah, I will strive so hard to give you a marriage they would envy. I am not perfect but I will always leave the male ego aside to tell you how deeply sorry I am when there is need for that. I would never sleep except I can restore that smile on your face after any difference we might have, by Allah’s will. My wife my gift of inestimable value…! I will be given you the key to my heart and would want you to be the mother of our wonderful children. I know it’s not going to be an easy task but I pray Allah will always give you sustenance to achieve these great feats. So much I have to share with you in the course of time but for now, I need to be out to prepare a world to receive you in, my lovely wife To be continued… Ridwan Adeoye is an animal technologist and a budding writer who hopes to marry a very pious muslimah soon.

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