Sex in Ramadan

Dear 1one4 Aunty,

I got married to my best friend in May this year. It was a wonderful programme, the love was palpable, you could almost touch it. I am certainly a testament to the wonders being with a good friend does to relationships. We were both very happy and beamed throughout the occasion. Love is a beautiful thing; I can now say authoritatively. Married life has also been wonderful, I have someone that continuously think about me and makes all the sacrifices just to make me happy. All we do is laugh together day and night.

I am married to a real red blooded guy. My husband wants sex every single night- mind blowing sex. While I have obliged him as a good wife to date, I have insisted on not doing anything throughout Ramadan so we can focus on plenty of du’a and dhikr. We need to forget about the pleasures of the flesh for these 30 days to get the highest reward, I believe. This has not worked with him and we have indulged in sex up till now. Since our being together means sex, I decided to go on I’tikaf without so much of his permission. I just sent a text to inform him that I have decided to partake in the programme and even google marked my location so he knows am really in that mosque.

I believe it is imperative to be devoted in these 30 days especially the last 10 days; he just wants to carry on as usual. Anyway, he has called my entire family to report and they are all insisting I check out of I’tikaf. I intend to ignore them all and switch off my phones. Am I doing anything wrong by wanting to be closer to Allah for now?

Sherifah

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